Food for Thought and More Poetry

This picture is inspired by the handiwork of someone much more talented than I (and better looking too no doubt).

Here are some poems that are the result of a game I was playing with a pal of mine via chat.
She'd supply 3 words and I'd write something using them.
Here is a sampling.

lamps, beetle, iguana

I had a lamp beside my bed, up the top right near my head...or perhaps I'll speak of beetles instead. Or I could, if you wanna, talk about my pet iguana

frisbee, chowder, weasle

I'm addicted to my frisbee. I grind it into powder. I snort it up my nose and sprinkle it on chowder. To my weasle I once gave a dose, it also sniffed it up it's nose.

cicada, granite, foam

The cicada is a nasty bug, it chirrups all night long. I want to crush it with my fist or bash it with my thong. I'd like to see one panic and I pummelled it with granite. Listen to it wail and moan as I turned it's form to ooze and foam.

kettle, walnut, billygoat

I threw my kettle at the old billy goat and he turned around and bit my scrote. To late was I, I sadly found, both my walnuts on the ground.

Tourist Poem

Take me not to palaces, or bridges or to towers.
Please don’t take me anywhere I have to queue for hours.
I do not care for Queens, or for Kings or Presidents,
I do not care for Popes or Duchesses of Kent.
I am quite keen on galleries, with art upon the walls,
And ancient ruins please me, and lakes and waterfalls.
If nature had a hand in it, then you can count me in,
But if you pay a price to stand in line, my patience will wear thin.
Take me somewhere wonderful, with food and drink and a view.
Take me somewhere colourful where I can discuss the world with you.
Leave out all the tourists traps and foreigners with glee.
A hundred million foreigners messing up the place.
Like me.

Based on a coversation with an international friend.

Happy Birthday to the Blog

I chose a new template for the blog yesterday and spent several hours fucking about getting it neat and tidy.
In the middle of all this I realised that the Sandwichbag was 1 year old on the 6th of this month!
I will take the time to thank individuals later in the year when I head off, but I'd like to say a big thank you to everyone who took the time to leave comments, and to the small collection of truly excellent fellows who have taken the time to email and correspond.
Here's a big huzzah for art, film, food, music and friends I've never met.

Ok

I had a minute to slop something together.

More more more

I'm busy and irritable so you are all stuck with more rubbish from me.
I think I may have posted it before....

I've just had a look at this for the first time in a long time and I'm actually pretty pleased with it. It's full of references to my friends - the labels on the booze are named after several people I know, and the fellow with the ponytail and the droplet of sick is a good pal of mine (and a known repeat vomitor).

Technical folks may be interested to know that the animation was done mostly using Photoshop trickery (this was before I had After Effects).

Still Drunk

For some reason I've had to repost this...

More Drunkeness

I've been busy in the edit suite over the last few days.
Hours and hours in After Effects is a bit of a brain drain, so instead of new shiny drawings you are stuck with repeat doses of my shitty animation.

Commercials on Demand

Out here in the wilderness we make a lot of commercials.
Often times I only have a few hours notice to get something to air.
Agfest is a very large agricultural show here in Tassie.
I threw this together in about an hour.
It's not well animated but it's cute.
It's the one sheep animated in After Effects and repeated at different speeds and sizes.
The gunshot effect was a joke my editor added and did't actually go to air even though it's really funny.

Popular Opinion

This is my entry for last months Eurovision Art Contest.
The topic was - The 4th Dimension.

Gag By Spotswood, Artwork by Cowan

In Australia on a Friday, when it's getting to the end of the day, someone will usually say "Well it's nearly beer o'clock" which is a signal for someone to run to the bottle shop and grab some beers.
Beer o'clock is anywhere between 4:30 and 5:30.
It's past beer o'clock now and I am looking forward to continuing the session at the pub.
Have a good weekend, may see some of you.

Incident On High Street

You can probably work this one out.

Update.
Speaking of girls bottoms, here is a girl whose bottom I'd be keen to see.
This is Clare Bowditch, one of my favourite Australian singers.
Is she not simply delightful?
She's also a fine lyricist to boot, and a great singer.
And she's married to some lucky bastard!

More Sea Sickness

Parasites

This may not be finished....


I had an irritating afternoon and would like to pass my headache on to all of you.

Horrors

Expression

Is there room in a commerical job for personal expression.
Is one really able to subvert or tell the truth when there is a brief and dollars at stake?
The image on the left is the kind of cute slop commonly available.
The image on the right is a gut feeling (for me anyway, nothing pleasing about falling in love as far as I'm concerned).
On the left there's populist silliness, on the right personal silliness.

Two Guns

This is the handiwork of one of my university lecturers, Terry Matasoni (who we called Terry Two Guns for no reason I can recall).
He gave it to me for my 21st.
It's a lithograph I think.
It's one of my very few treasures and will be sad to leave it behind when I head off overseas.
Terry always encouraged us to fill up our canvas and it was something I took to heart.
It did take me a good 10 years to start producing images that didn't spread from horizon to horizon but the lessons learned were important.
Terry was a great teacher (he took our life drawing classes).
I think he felt it was more important to love drawing than to draw beautifully - the theory being that if you love it you will eventually get better at it.

Individual Voices

Voodoo

It was a relief to draw this today.

More voodoo?...switched at birth?

Exceedingly Silly

Silliness of the highest order.
This is the only piece of my high school art that remains, and I've only just worked out that in 2 years it will be 20 years old (oh. my. god...)
I only did two years of art and this sort of nonsense may be the reason why.
I remember having tears pouring down my face as I did it.
I thought it was hilarious.
It's essentially 50 odd pages of scribble.
This is the front cover.
For those who can't read it, it says "The Grate Bycentenial Rad Art Book Wich is Good" (spelled wrong on purpose).
It was Australias bicentenial at the time - 1988.


A page from the book - it was all done in wax crayon.


It included several centrefolds, here is a portion of one of them.


Another page.


And there was a free ice cream container lid jammed in the middle.


I am hugely fond of silly things and this is perhaps the silliest thing I've ever done.
I remember it with great fondness however and it's a miracle I've still got it (I tend to throw out all my work every couple of years when it's old and embarassing).

Cheat

Painter has a lot of silly tools but if you fiddle with them a bit you can do some interesting things.

Also - a big thanks to visitor #27500 from Hawaiian Gardens, California.
You win a handjob from your favorite Hollywood celebrity.